Posts Tagged ‘Chronic Fatigue’

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Where I’ve been, where I’m going….

July 11, 2009

I’ve been travelling through some astounding chronic fatigue days of late. I’m feeling better still. I remember those days of pouring myself into the closest chair, not being able to get a drink from the fridge, showering only when it was absolutely necessary and dreading that thought. I’ve come so far and now I’m going further. I’ve had some recent and confusing developments in terms of some new vitality – two things happened and I don’t know which one of them is the reason for my newfound vigor.

Two weeks ago, I stopped for coffee at the local gas station. You know the coffee (sucks) and you know the kind of cup (paper with the ridiculously stupid paper sleeve), as I tried to get out of my car, I grabbed the coffee cup from near the top – too freaking HOT! and while trying to adjust the cup in my hand, I promptly spilled the steaming hot coffee all over my left hand. It turned out to be a 2nd degree burn – nasty white seared skin that blistered horribley and hurt like a screaming mimi for more than a week. Strangely, on this same day, I developed a UTI (urinary tract infection) – I get these fairly frequently, probably due to an overgrowth of candida, but who knows. Anyway, I take D-Mannose to cure these when I get them – it works pretty well, I just drink 1/2 teaspoon in water about every four hours. (word to the wise here, if you’re experiencing a UTI with fever, chills, outrageous frequency, urgency and pain – quit messing around and get yourself to the doctor today!)

d-mannoseD-Mannose is a common treatment for those seeking a non-antibiotic answer for urinary symptoms of frequency, urgency, minor pain. D-Mannose is a natural sugar that your body produces and it can be purchased at your healthfood store in powder or gel-pill form (it’s cheaper online though). Related article on D-Mannose: http://www.tahoma-clinic.com/mannose.shtml

So all that week, I was supplementing with d-mannose and at the same time nursing my nasty burn. By Friday of that week, I had huge huge huge energy! Me! I went swimming at two different public pools (if you’ve had cfs at all, you know ding dang well that even wriggling into your suit is out of the question, let alone swimming some laps, let alone all the showering!) By the following monday, I was at the local track, *Running* UP the aluminum stadium steps over & over again – I probably ran up these steps 8 times & back down again – my big fat heart raging, heavy breathing and me sitting on the top after each course, smiling like a little ninny ūüôā

So which of those two happenings was the one that increased my energy by such proportions? It’s well known that your body goes into overdrive when you experience a severe burn – waking up all kinds of cellular activity. Or, is it some currently unknown property of the D-Mannose ? I dunno! But the D-mannose is cheap enough for me to continue that regimine – $15 for about 10 days worth. So I’m gonna continue that treatment before I whip out my curling iron and smack my upper arm with another nasty sear on my flesh. I’ll let ya know how it goes…

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Summer Movie Toys: Ice Age 3, Transformers 2 Revenge are getting me In the Groove

June 18, 2009

IceAge3I’ve been working on this summer’s blockbuster kids movies and their related toy websites lately. Ice Age 3 and Transformers 2 Revenge of the Fallen and all their tons of toys have given me great inspiration in the midst of my foibles. I find kids movie toys to be the key to what vigor I have, it’s fun to discover all the dinosaurs and blasters and imagine myself a kid again. Ice Age 3 is simply a riot of goofy scenes and hilarious one-liners and Transformers Revenge of the Fallen proves to offer enough smashing to resolve any level of frustration.

It’s more than just frivolity – we all need to feel productive, and given my circumstances these toy pages are my best effort at preventing the chronic fatigue doldrums from taking hold. To be certain, there are much better schemes for making money at home, but in contrast to that thought – ya gotta do what you love, don’t ya? It would be easy to let the summer drift away amid Oprah shows and Jeopardy, but somewhere I hear my mom’s voice calling out that I need to strive, to move forward, to pursue productivity despite my limitations. More simply put, it’s fun to find fun in fun, so I’ll keep working on it.


Visit my latest toy pages: Ice Age 3 Dawn of the Dinosaurs , Terminator Salvation Toys and Transformers Revenge of the Fallen Toys

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Chronic Fatigue versus Christmas: I’m Dreaming, I know…

December 12, 2008

christmaswindowA heartwarming fire in the fireplace, even a fake one would do. The scent of fresh pine boughs conjuring up memories of Christmas Past, coupled with the blossoms of sugar cookies in the oven that I’ll soon fashion with sparkling sugar flakes. Sharing a cup of Christmas Cheer while gazing at a brightly glowing tree all ashimmer with tinsel and colored lights. It’s a wonderful dream, these tangible elements of a romantic Yuletide, and one that most of my friends and family are able to create. But Chronic Fatigue and Christmas don’t mix and for me at least, even to admit that to my family and friends, is wholly embarrassing.

There’s no decorating: I’d love to bring my house into the land of the living with vibrant displays of ornaments, garlands and snowy character scenes. But I’m not even capable of bringing down the Christmas box from the top shelf in the closet. Then to imagine creating bits of flair around my livingroom sounds like it’s beyond anyone’s energy reserves. Nor can I imagine myself decorating a pretty tree (how would that get into my house?). That activity represents a long term standing session coupled with daunting strains of bending, reaching, squirming. I suppose I could manifest the energy, but for me as always, there is an energy cost analysis of where to best spend my daily outlay.

Does my family understand? No, I’m sure they think that I’m lazy, or lack Christmas Spirit, or that I’m too self absorbed. I’m so fortunate that my husband doesn’t care and doesn’t even mention it. Then too, I can well imagine that this is a source of difficulty for families everywhere, in houses where the would-be decorator suffers from CFS.

There’s no Shopping: I imagine wrangling with coats, mittens and then mangling through slippery traffic in the winter wonderland. Bustling then through parking lots, shops, and cashier queues to gleefully find the perfect representation of my love to offer. This too is a complete impossibility. If I love you truly, you’re all getting the same imported cookies that are the one undiscovered secret of my local grocery. I’m so happy to be able to simply visit my grocer and manage that task without contemplating a mobile grocery cart. If I love you more than truly, I’ll be able to burn a CD of my favorite music for you, because here at my computer, I can sit and create with ease. If I hadn’t lost my job, I would certainly take advantage of shopping online. But as everyone can acknowledge, lately this is much too weighty on the pocketbook.

There’s no wrapping: To any normal person, doesn’t this sound like the most simple of tasks? For the CFS person, this little ditty can become a rigorous onslaught of terror. Where do the pretty papers, ribbons and bows come from? Where on earth did those sticker gift tags run off to? I suppose it can be managed, but when combined with the other stresses of the season and the dedication of time and attention to the matter, this task represents yet another CFS hill to climb. If I put a sticky bow on your untagged box of cookies, will you love me just the same?

Feast without Expectation: I will do my very best to create the perfect Christmas Dinner. Fortunately in my house that allows for a roast chicken rather than turkey. My energy does afford the ability to stock the household with festive feastings and I’m quite able to manage cooking a lovely glazed spread of delights. But for many I know, this too is another holiday expression of love that falls to the wayside. At the very least, this is one area where local restaurants or caterers can assist those that are still struggling.

Dreaming of a Splendid White Christmas: As one given to outrageous fantasy, I dream of days of shooshing on the ski slopes of Telluride and then exchanging romantic gifts with hubby in our suite during our fabulous red-cheeked Colorado Christmas. Or I still envision sculpting christmas bears and bunnies on our front lawn and stringing them up with lights for nighttime neighborhood display. My mind still yearns to be dressed to the hilt in red velvet or satin and share drinks and flirtations at hubby’s company christmas party. All in a dream, my friend.

The Spirit of Christmas Still Lives: Your chronic fatigued spouse, mom or dad, family or friend still loves you just the same. Even if we fail to meet your holiday expectations, even if we fail miserably in expressing our love and heartfelt Christmas greetings, even if we’re entirely incapable of sharing in the fun, please know that we want to show our love and we’re all trying the very best that we can.


Visit my latest toy pages: Ice Age 3 Dawn of the Dinosaurs , Terminator Salvation Toys and Transformers Revenge of the Fallen Toys

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CFS: My New Fear

April 10, 2008

I’m in the midst of my carefully devised plan to overcome Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.¬† I’ve changed my diet, found amazingly effective supplements in the form of NT Factor and D-Ribose, and I’ve garnered some success.¬† But a new fear is overtaking me lately.¬† The clinical studies involved with these ‘new found’ supplements reflect only a 40-45% improvement of CFS symptoms.¬† And this is where I am right now.¬† Does this mean that where I am is as good as it’s going to get?¬†¬† Have I reached the pinnacle of improvement?

I no longer pour myself into the couch after walking just a few steps into the livingroom,¬† I can walk and do some normal life endeavors or attend an event without the need to collapse, but is this all there is?¬†¬† I don’t know the answer….¬† I have to keep working, keep detoxing, keep hoping, keep praying…


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CFS: Thankful for the Tiniest Things

April 8, 2008

My poor hurting brother was in the hospital today…¬† He was set for an angiogram, he’s been having heart pain again.¬† During his angiogram, they decided to go ahead and give him a new shunt too.¬† (Is it a shunt, a stent?¬† Stint stent stunt, shint shent shunt… I forget)¬†¬† Anway, I was his dutiful companion, aid, and chauffeur…¬†¬† I managed to get up early for the 8am appointment just fine, as always this meant no real sleep, but I felt ok – even without¬†my morning boost of happy coffee.

But here’s the revelation of improvement in the tiniest of things –¬† I parked in a parking garage and had to walk.¬† Those of you with CFS know what I’m talking about… the looming, sweating, palpating fear: “Walk exactly how far??? Ramps?? Hills? Stairs??”¬† These thoughts never even occurred to me!¬† That’s how amazing this experience was.¬†¬† I remember having been to this hospital before (and I wasn’t a¬†patient)¬†and gauging every painful aching step, wondering how soon I would be able to sit, wondering if I could even make it down the hallway,¬†and my previous visits hadn’t included any parking ramps.

Today I managed going back to my car three times, traversing these parking ramps that other ‘normal’ people wouldn’t even notice, walking down the hallways without even a thought of sitting down to rest.¬† There, in my mind, I’ve exactly quantified my 40% improvement.

Make no mistake though, after transporting him, sitting in the hospital room during his procedure, conversing with the nursing staff, making him comfortable when he came back from his surgery and then transporting him home, a total of 8.5 hours¬†– I’m deadwater exhausted: finished, zombied, cattywhompus brained.¬†

So Chronic Fatigue spoke twice to me today –¬† I am better than I had ever hoped even in the tiniest of realms, and yet still stuck in the muddy mire of always being on the¬†precipice of exhaustion.

 Surgeons Search The Internet


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CFS – My Chronic Fatigue – Can My 40% Improvement be Quantified?

March 27, 2008

Around Christmas time, I was feeling about 25% better.  This meant that I could do one or two things without collapsing altogether.  I was able to take a 20 minute walk, OR do the dishes, OR cook dinner without too much complaint.  This is stark contrast to where I began this journey last September, when I was unable to get dressed or evey comb my hair.

Since then, I’ve changed my diet, added some important supplements – NT Factor and D-Ribose and my sleep has greatly improved.¬† Indulgences of Christmas took me several weeks to get over –¬†¬† re-dieting and paying greater attention to my goals.¬†¬† In February and March, I’ve kept up with my supplements and gone a little wayward on my diet due to wildly flucuating PMS, but in general I’ve maintained my program.¬†

About¬†2 weeks¬†ago, I took a 2.5 mile hike!¬† If that doesn’t scream out 40% better, I don’t what ;).¬†¬† This past weekend was a Family Easter Party Event and I had fun!¬† Foremost in my mind was the comparison to my family’s christmas party where I was able to stand and talk and participate emotionally.¬† But after that party was over – I felt the need to collapse and recover.¬†¬† This time, for the Easter party, I had more fun – easily standing and engaging in conversation (CFS sufferers find conversation very difficult and energy consuming).¬† I noted to my family that I had showered, dressed, gone to the grocery store, played at the party and still felt good!¬†¬† I was sure tired when I got home, but it felt like a supreme accomplishment.¬†¬†¬† I’m pretty sure that the preparation for the Christmas Party required taking my shower the day before and laying out my clothes in advance to save on energy costs ūüėČ

So there you have it, I can do Something, or Two Things, not including the energy expended for showering and getting dressed!  I can participate emotionally and converse and enjoy small portions of life without getting immediately overloaded. 

Just this past week, I went through another bout of PMS, and sugar was in my house once again – Arrgghh! it’s like a sickness that stuff!¬† Anyway, I’m back on the program again and paying attention to non-processed foods, extra veggies and salads and seriously considering sauerkraut juice ‘therapy’ a.k.a. flingin’ it up my butt once again.¬†¬† It’s so weird…¬† when I have PMS I am just not in my right mind and I simply cannot control that sugary stuff –¬† I’ve conquered that in the past, but MAN I struggle.¬†¬† I know now that I have to prepare for the onslaught of PMS insanity a week in advance and be deadset on not screwing up! (Stevia helps with this, and I’m out, let’s get some!)

I’m taking walks several times a week, usually for about 30 minutes, but haven’t crossed that magnificent 2.5 mile threshold again…. but I’m a’gonna!¬†¬† I’ve noted previously in my blog that I’m starting Colonix Colon Cleansing again in April – that’s still gonna happen too!

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Chronic Fatigue Syndrome – Cortisol Treatment? It Makes Me Skeptical

March 27, 2008

I am the first to admit that I have¬†a distrust of the medical community, perhaps it’s more reasonable to say that it’s pharmaceuticals, either/or let’s say.¬† Recent reports show CFS symptoms can improve through the application of cortisol shots administered by your physician.¬† Another “non-cure” and yet effective treatment.¬†¬†¬† Cortisol is low in CFS Patients Study , Cortisol Treatment Study Shows CFS Symptom Improvement¬†.¬†¬†

¬†Not too long ago, I watched a PBS special with Dr. Perricone wherein he stated that my cortisol levels were at the root of my weight gain and aging complaints, he’s termed it the “death hormone“.¬†

I’m no scientist,¬† I know adrenal fatigue is a major factor in my CFS symptoms and cortisol injections would indeed further adrenal fatigue.¬† It makes me suspicious once again of the medical community.¬†¬†Like my¬†most recent experience with the drug Advair for asthma, I stopped using it for this reason¬†– millions of asthma patients use it, yet¬†people are dying¬†from its use?¬† Advair Article¬†¬† I am again suspicious of the cortisol treatments until there’s a long term treatment study.

The variances between the formal medical community and natural healing methods can be so enormous and worrysome, that it makes me tend toward natural methods exclusively.¬† I hope that¬†my diet and supplement path works¬†as well as cortisol injections.¬† If you’re a CFS patient and receiving these cortisol shots and no other medications, please comment on your results!


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